What do I have to do to get my mom to have custody of me? 19 Answers as of August 24, 2011

I have never lived with my dad. I just go over there on the weekend. The only reason he has custody is because my mom has never contested it and she has the records where I started going to school with her in 2nd grade. I have lived with her since but he has threatened me that he is going to take me away from my mother I know for a fact my father can not pass a drug test but I don't want him to go to jail but I now want my mom to have custody of me so can I just sign an affidavit and say I no longer want my father to have custody and won't have to get lawyers involved? I don't know if it matters but they are still legally married but have not been together since 1998 or so.

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Beresford Booth PLLC
Beresford Booth PLLC | S. Scott Burkhalter
You mother will need to file for divorce and have a parenting plan established.
Answer Applies to: Washington
Replied: 8/24/2011
Law Office of Roianne H. Conner
Law Office of Roianne H. Conner | Roianne Houlton Conner
If there is a Court Order that your father has custody then a modification of the Order has to be filed in the original court. You would have to testify as to the reasons you want to live with Mom as opposed to Dad.
Answer Applies to: Alabama
Replied: 8/19/2011
Beaulier Law Office
Beaulier Law Office | Maury Beaulier
First, this is an adult issue that should be discussed and handled by your parents. Second, either parent may commence a legal action for custody, legal separation or divorce wherein a court makes custody determinations based on what it believes to be in the child's best interests, In such a proceeding, the child's wishes are considered.
Answer Applies to: Minnesota
Replied: 8/18/2011
Law Offices of Paul A. Eads, A.P.C.
Law Offices of Paul A. Eads, A.P.C. | Paul A. Eads
Absent a court order, both parents have equal rights to visitation with you.
Answer Applies to: California
Replied: 8/18/2011
Joanna Mitchell & Associates, P.A.
Joanna Mitchell & Associates, P.A. | Joanna Mitchell
Your mom would need to file a divorce and request that you live with her the majority of the time. If you are a minor, there is nothing you can do until you turn 18.
Answer Applies to: Florida
Replied: 8/17/2011
    John E. Kirchner, Attorney at Law
    John E. Kirchner, Attorney at Law | John Kirchner
    There is nothing you, as a minor, can do directly. Since there has never been any legal proceeding, you need to convince your mother to begin divorce proceedings. In those proceedings, the question of how parenting responsibilities (including where you live) will be decided based on what a judge believes is in your best interest. Your desires, and any information about your Dad that you can provide, will be relevant to that decision. But, you do not have the final say in anything.
    Answer Applies to: Colorado
    Replied: 8/17/2011
    Law Office of Michael W. Bugni
    Law Office of Michael W. Bugni | Jay W. Neff
    There is very little that you can do directly. I'd think that your best bet would be to talk to the school counselor about the situation.
    Answer Applies to: Washington
    Replied: 8/17/2011
    Fox Law Firm LLC
    Fox Law Firm LLC | Tina Fox
    I don't know how old you are now, but the court will take into consideration the wishes of the child especially a child who is 14yrs of age and older.
    Answer Applies to: Illinois
    Replied: 8/16/2011
    Cody and Gonillo, LLP
    Cody and Gonillo, LLP | Christine Gonilla
    You don't say if there are any orders already in place. It sounds like your dad is just making threats that he cannot fulfill. If there were ever a contest, your wishes would be taken into account but there would be court involvement whether lawyers would have to be involved would be up to your parents.
    Answer Applies to: Connecticut
    Replied: 8/16/2011
    Horizons Law Group, LLC
    Horizons Law Group, LLC | Michelle B. Fitzgerald
    If they are still legally married, then neither one can hold you back from staying with or visiting the other one. Meaning - your Mom already has custody of you and your Dad's rights are not above hers. It would be unusual for there to be any sort of court order for him to have custody without a divorce or separation filed previously.
    Answer Applies to: Wisconsin
    Replied: 8/16/2011
    Wallin & Klarich: A Law Corporation
    Wallin & Klarich: A Law Corporation | Paul Wallin
    Unfortunately it is your mother that must go to court and ask the court to change custody by showing a "material change in circumstances".
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 8/16/2011
    Glenn E. Tanner
    Glenn E. Tanner | Glenn E. Tanner
    If there is no parenting plan in place in Washington, your parent's rights and obligations to you are the same.
    Answer Applies to: Washington
    Replied: 8/16/2011
    The Law Offices of Robert W. Bellamy
    The Law Offices of Robert W. Bellamy | Robert W. Bellamy
    Since there is no divorce but a separation, your parents (both) have not helped you or did you any favor. You seem to be old enough to tell a family court judge what you want and he/she will listen. Unfortunately, there is no court action. You could bring in the Department of Human Resources (DHR).
    Answer Applies to: Alabama
    Replied: 8/16/2011
    Ashman Law Office
    Ashman Law Office | Glen Edward Ashman
    You have no say on your own. Your mom does. She can go to Court and assert her rights if she chooses.
    Answer Applies to: Georgia
    Replied: 8/16/2011
    Law Office of Kathryn L. Hudson
    Law Office of Kathryn L. Hudson | Kathryn L. Hudson
    If there was a custody order issued by a court your mom can do what is called a Modification of Custody. This is a motion to the court that there are material changes since the last order that warrant the order being changed. In your case you have been living with your mother your whole life and your father threatens to take you to live with him. I hate to say this, but what your father has done is to be the custodial parent in name only thereby avoiding having to pay child support all of these years. Your mother should consult a lawyer to help her.
    Answer Applies to: Arkansas
    Replied: 8/16/2011
    Petit & Dommershausen SC
    Petit & Dommershausen SC | Tajara Dommershausen
    Nothing your mother would have to something. It isn't your place. However if you have lives with your dad and he tries to take you, the court would be unlikely to let him
    Answer Applies to: Wisconsin
    Replied: 8/16/2011
    Law Office of L. Paul Zahn
    Law Office of L. Paul Zahn | Paul Zahn
    There is nothing for you to be concerned about. You don't state your age, but I would gather that you are likley in your teenage years. He can threaten all he wants, but if you tell the court (should it come to that) that you don't want to go, then you won't be required to go. I know this can be scary and I am sorry you are being put in the middle of this, but it isn't anything for you to worry about.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 8/16/2011
    Law Office Of Jody A. Miller
    Law Office Of Jody A. Miller | Jody A. Miller
    If your parents are still married and there is no custody order in effect, they each have equal custodial rights and you can live with whichever parent you want to; there is no need for any documents or lawyers. All you need to do is go to your Mother's house and start living there.
    Answer Applies to: Georgia
    Replied: 8/16/2011
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