What can we do if my husbands ex is trying to stop visitation? 2 Answers as of April 11, 2011My fiancee's ex wife is determined to stop him from having any contact with her. We are in court right now trying to get specific parenting times she can't be difficult about. The real issue that concerns me is that lately his ex is trying to convince his 9 year old daughter that she would not be safe around me. When he talks to his daughter, she always says that she would like to spend time with him, but not if I am there because her mom is concerned that if I am there, she won't be safe. My fiancee reassures his daughter and all is fine until the next round.
His ex wife has no reason to believe the child will not be safe in my presence. I have no abuse history. No alcohol or drug use history. I am an employed college graduate with absolutely no criminal record. The ex is using this as a ploy to stop visitation. In fact, I have only spent about a day in the daughter's company due to the ex's efforts to stop visitation when we are in Ohio (the ex sent the daughter out of state during our most recent trip) which was only our 2nd to Ohio since we got together. My concern, we have court coming up in the next few months to finalize our request for visitation. It is becoming obvious the ex is going to attempt to say that visitation needs to happen when I am not there (which isn't reasonable as my fiancee and I live together) nor is it reasonable because I also want a relationship with my fiancee's daughter. How worried do we need to be that the ex will manage to convince the courts that I am harmful to the daughter? I am afraid that my presence will cause him to no get custody. Again not because the ex has any reason to claim so, but I am afraid the courts will take the word of a so-called worried mother and stop my fiancee from seeing his daughter. Which isn't good for either of them.
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Your fears, while reasonable, particularly given the possibly mercurial nature of the Judge, are based on a 'worst case' scenario. Given your history, the Court should decide that there is no issue with the children being around you and flat-out deny the ex-wife's bid to limit or prevent contact with you. Your fiance should move for a FC 3111 evaluation, or even an EC 730 evaluation. The ex-wife is clearly dangerously vindictive. She is harming the children. She clearly does not care about the best interests of the children. Her indoctrination of the child is completely inappropriate and unacceptable and should be exposed. Any decent Judge will be very unhappy with such efforts to poison your fiance's daughter's nascent relationship with her new step-mother. If, after obtaining Court orders regarding specific visiting times (which should definitely not preclude your presence), the ex-wife continues to frustrate visitation, your fiance should file an Order to Show Cause, re: Contempt. Eventually, the ex-wife's actions will come back to haunt her.
Answer Applies to: California