My husband is cheating on me and I want to get a divorce, what can I do? 36 Answers as of July 14, 2011

Is it true that if my husband is cheating on me I can get more money during the divorce? What kind of evidence do I need for this?

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Bagwell Holt Smith Jones & Crowson, P.A.
Bagwell Holt Smith Jones & Crowson, P.A. | John G. Miskey IV
Hello, If your husband cheated on you, this generally strengthens your claims for post-separation support (temporary financial support) and alimony (financial support which could continue indefinitely).
Answer Applies to: North Carolina
Replied: 7/14/2011
Horizons Law Group, LLC
Horizons Law Group, LLC | Michelle B. Fitzgerald
It may be true in some states, but not in WI. We are considered a 'no-fault' divorce state, which means you (or he) can request a divorce and do not need to give a reason. The court can't consider misconduct in the marriage either when doing support or property division.
Answer Applies to: Wisconsin
Replied: 7/14/2011
Law Offices of Sheryl S. Graf
Law Offices of Sheryl S. Graf | Sheryl S. Graf
California is a "no fault" divorce state. That means it doesn't matter who the "good guy" or "bad guy" is, who wants the divorce, nor why. The only qualifying factor to obtain a divorce is that "irreconcilable differences" have arisen during the marriage. Identification of specifically what those differences are is not necessary. Proof of infidelity will not typically change any of the legal issues in your case. The information presented is general in nature and should not be construed to be formal legal advice, nor the formation of a lawyer/client relationship.
Answer Applies to: California
Replied: 7/13/2011
Law Office of Robert L. Fiedler
Law Office of Robert L. Fiedler | Robert L Fiedler
It is not necessarily true, although it is possible. The courts today do not put much weight into fault unless it is very significant, and even then, the amount the courts may adjust the financials is small. Your first step would be to file for divorce. Depending on your specific situation, you may want to have an attorney do it for you.
Answer Applies to: Connecticut
Replied: 7/13/2011
Koch Laron Law
Koch Laron Law | Phillip Koch
No, CA is a no fault state, however, depending on a number of factors, he may have to pay all your attorney fees and it may effect child custody. I suggest you consult with a family law attorney. My firm offers a free one hour consultation.
Answer Applies to: California
Replied: 7/13/2011
    Pontrello Law
    Pontrello Law | William Pontrello
    file for a divorce with the clerk of court or better yet get a lawyer to do it.
    Answer Applies to: Florida
    Replied: 7/13/2011
    Law Office of Roianne H. Conner
    Law Office of Roianne H. Conner | Roianne Houlton Conner
    If you want a divorce, you need to talk with an attorney. If you can prove that he is in fact cheating on you then based on the length of the marriage you may be entitled to more than 50% of the marital property.
    Answer Applies to: Alabama
    Replied: 7/13/2011
    Willick Law Group
    Willick Law Group | Marshal S. Willick
    In Nevada, adultery per se is irrelevant to grounds for divorce, or terms - but if there is economic waste, or other issues (such as transmission of a STD) other issues might present themselves. Your best bet is consultation with a family law specialist.
    Answer Applies to: Nevada
    Replied: 7/13/2011
    Cody and Gonillo, LLP
    Cody and Gonillo, LLP | Christine Gonilla
    the cause of the breakdown is one of many other factors a court must weigh The information contained in this email may be confidential and/or legally privileged. It has been sent for the sole use of the intended recipient(s).
    Answer Applies to: Connecticut
    Replied: 7/13/2011
    Michael Apicella
    Michael Apicella | Apicella Law and Mediation
    If you're in California, please note that California is a "no-fault" State. Meaning, it doesn't matter why parties are getting divorced. It only matters that one party wants a divorce because of "irreconcilable differences." Thus, any facts relative to an affair are irrelevant.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 7/13/2011
    Apple Law Firm PLLC
    Apple Law Firm PLLC | David Goldman
    Florida is a no fault divorce state. Generally these facts have little to do with the settlement amount if a case goes to court. Sometimes they can have a benefit in a mediation depending on the circumstances.
    Answer Applies to: Florida
    Replied: 7/13/2011
    Michael D. Fluke, P.A.
    Michael D. Fluke, P.A. | Michael D. Fluke
    Infidelity can be a basis when the court is considering alimony or the distribution of property to the extent that marital funds were spent on an extramarital affair. I suggest you consult a local Family Law attorney to discuss your case in greater detail and learn all of your rights and options. Good luck.
    Answer Applies to: Florida
    Replied: 7/13/2011
    Fox Law Firm LLC
    Fox Law Firm LLC | Tina Fox
    This is not the case in Illinois. This is a grounds for divorce but does not automatically equate more money to the spouse.
    Answer Applies to: Illinois
    Replied: 7/13/2011
    Donaldson Stewart, PC
    Donaldson Stewart, PC | Monica H. Donaldson Stewart
    Since Arizona is a no-fault state, his infidelity in and of itself does not affect the division of the marital assets. If you can prove that he's "wasted" community funds on an extra-marital relationship (e.g. gifts, vacations, etc.), then you may be able to get the court to order him to reimburse your half of those funds. I recommend you speak with an attorney to discuss the details of your situation so you can learn your options and determine your best course of action.
    Answer Applies to: Arizona
    Replied: 7/13/2011
    Law Office Of Jody A. Miller
    Law Office Of Jody A. Miller | Jody A. Miller
    The infidelity in and of itself will not necessarily result in more money; however it is a factor that the judge can consider. As far as evidence - you can use the discovery process and a private investigator to help build a case.
    Answer Applies to: Georgia
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    Law Office of James Lentz
    Law Office of James Lentz | James Lentz
    Infidelity is one of the reasons you can get a divorce in Ohio. But it will be only one of many factors involved in the division of property. Please see a local domestic relations attorney for more information.
    Answer Applies to: Ohio
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    Law Office of Margaret D. Wilson
    Law Office of Margaret D. Wilson | Margaret Wilson
    If a person has determined that their marriage is over and they no longer wish to be married they can file for dissolution of marriage. Since California is a no fault state there are no benefits of fault. In fact the court doesn't care if one party cheated on the other and judges often get annoyed when it is made an issue during the case because California is a no fault state.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    Gregory T. Buckley, Attorney at Law
    Gregory T. Buckley, Attorney at Law | Gregory T. Buckley
    Florida is a no-fault state, so his cheating does not necessarily influence the divorce. But the court will definitely take it into account in determining custody/visitation/time-sharing with the children, as well as it being a factor in any alimony determinations.
    Answer Applies to: Florida
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    John E. Kirchner, Attorney at Law
    John E. Kirchner, Attorney at Law | John Kirchner
    Cheating is basically irrelevant to any financial issues in a Colorado divorce unless you can demonstrate a direct connection to any financial loss (e.g. if your husband used marital savings to purchase assets for his mistress).
    Answer Applies to: Colorado
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    Ashman Law Office
    Ashman Law Office | Glen Edward Ashman
    Alimony and support are most based on financial need and not fault. Equitable division can be affected by fault. You are approaching this wrong. You don't build a case. That is a good way to get a bad result. Get a good lawyer and let your lawyer build your case and determine what matters. Generally, not having a lawyer is the best way to lose a divorce case.
    Answer Applies to: Georgia
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    Law Offices of Arlene D. Kock
    Law Offices of Arlene D. Kock | Arlene D. Kock
    California is a no fault state which means that the property division will not be controlled by who was unfaithful in the marriage. If your husband squandered community assets or cash in ways the court determines was a violation of his fiduciary duty, then the court may award more assets to you to counterbalance any losses caused by husband's misuse of community property resources.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    Warner Center Law Offices of Donald F. Conviser
    Warner Center Law Offices of Donald F. Conviser | Donald F. Conviser
    California has no-fault divorce. You don't get extra money if your husband cheated on you, unless you can prove that he diverted community funds and/or assets to his girlfriend, or that he spent community funds on his relationship - in which case, you should be able to obtain reimbursement of your 1/2 community share of those diverted/spent funds or assets.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    Law Office of Xochitl Anita Quezada
    Law Office of Xochitl Anita Quezada | Xochitl Anita Quezada
    Unfortunately, California is a no fault state. Infidelity on his part won't get you more money. However, if there is a discrepancy in your income and he makes a lot more, you could get temporary spousal support.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    Law Office of Patricia Van Haren
    Law Office of Patricia Van Haren | Patricia Van Haren
    No, your husband's infidelity has no impact on the amount of money that you will receive during a divorce. California is a no fault state and as such the courts do not look at reasons why a party left the marriage or whether a spouse was unfaithful. All property which is acquired during the marriage is considered to be community property and therefore divided equally. The factors that a court will look at in determining support is the income of the parties and the length of marriage.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    Joanna Mitchell & Associates, P.A.
    Joanna Mitchell & Associates, P.A. | Joanna Mitchell
    Generally in Florida, the only time that infidelity plays any bearing on the distribution of assets or money is if it is an alimony case and it can be proven that the cheating spouse squandered marital assets or money on the lover. Otherwise, Florida is a no-fault state - which means that fault plays little to no bearing on how the issues of a divorce are decided.
    Answer Applies to: Florida
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    Seattle Divorce Services
    Seattle Divorce Services | Michael V. Fancher
    Washington is a no fault state, so the fact that your husband may be cheating on you does not get you anything more, although he could be required to repay community funds that have been spent on his affair.
    Answer Applies to: Washington
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    Petit & Dommershausen SC
    Petit & Dommershausen SC | Tajara Dommershausen
    Wisconsin is a no fault divorce state, his cheating on you has no effect on what money he may have to pay you.
    Answer Applies to: Wisconsin
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    Vincent J. Bernabei LLC
    Vincent J. Bernabei LLC | Vincent J. Bernabei
    Cheating alone won't make a difference in your divorce. If he's spending money on the other woman, or if she's spending money on him, that makes a difference. You should make copies of all credit card and bank statements.
    Answer Applies to: Oregon
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    Glenn E. Tanner
    Glenn E. Tanner | Glenn E. Tanner
    In Washington probably not unless his act consitutes waste or make the judge not like him.
    Answer Applies to: Washington
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    Law Office of Michael W. Bugni
    Law Office of Michael W. Bugni | Jay W. Neff
    Whether or not your spouse is cheating on you will not change your ability to get divorced. The documents you would need to file and serve would be the same regardless of whether he is cheating on you. As long as one of you is willing to swear in court that the marriage is irretrievably broken, then, sooner or later, there will be a divorce. The fact that your spouse is cheating on you also does not change how much money or property you may get in the divorce. The Washington statute says that in a divorce the court is to make a fair and equitable division of all of the debts and property without regard to marital misconduct. So, the fact that your spouse may be cheating, generally, does not affect how much money or property you may get in the divorce. Some of the factors that do impact how the debts and property get divided are: the duration of the marriage, each party's age, each party's health, each party's education, each party's work history, etc.
    Answer Applies to: Washington
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    Goolsby Law Office
    Goolsby Law Office | Richard Goolsby
    In Georgia, adultery, if proven, can affect alimony and property division. Good luck.
    Answer Applies to: Georgia
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    The Davies Law Firm, P.A.
    The Davies Law Firm, P.A. | Robert F. Davies, Esq.
    There are a few things that kill a marriage dead, and cheating is one of them. Divorce is complicated. You will have to decide what is the best way to handle things so that you and your children have what you need, a home, a comfortable life, college education, and so much more. Punishing him for cheating is something we can discuss. Look up the law on bringing his girlfriend into the divorce lawsuit, called 'corespondent'.
    Answer Applies to: New Jersey
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    Wallin & Klarich: A Law Corporation
    Wallin & Klarich: A Law Corporation | Paul Wallin
    You can file for divorce anytime you choose. California law does not take into account "why" you want the divorce. You cannot receive any additional money in damages even if you prove your husband is "cheating on you". Do not waste your money to establish "evidence" that your husband is cheating because the court really doesn't care why you want a divorce. The court will not punish him in any way for cheating on you.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    Palomino Law Firm, P.C.
    Palomino Law Firm, P.C. | Debra Palomino
    Arizona is a no fault divorce state, which means our husband won't be legally penalized for cheating. The division of assets and debts is done equitably, and depending on your financial position and disparity in incomes, you may request spousal maintenance. You can file for divorce with or without an attorney, the Maricopa County Superior Court has forms available online via it's Self Service Center.
    Answer Applies to: Arizona
    Replied: 7/12/2011
    Law Office of L. Paul Zahn
    Law Office of L. Paul Zahn | Paul Zahn
    California is a no fault divorce state. That means you don't have to prove he did anything wrong and he doesn't get penalized for doing bad things (for the most part). There is no penalty for cheating, other than getting the divorce.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 7/12/2011
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