How does one go about changing mediation agreement and would it be easy? 10 Answers as of May 01, 2014

My husband and I are constantly having problems with his ex when it comes to visitation and communication for and about his daughter. We have had to call the cops several times due to her aggressive behavior in front of our newborn and his daughter. She refuses to talk with either one of us about odd actions that a child shouldn't be doing with her toys. She shares a bedroom with her mom's boyfriend's child and we are worried that with lack of supervision, they might be doing things they shouldn't be. Or because of her mom's promiscuity, that she has witnessed sexual activity. She is not developing mentally the way she should be and is extremely attached to her mother in a non-healthy way. We only want the best for her but she isn't being raised in a great environment at all. Mother is also teaching her to call her daddy by his first name and her boyfriend daddy. It’s safe to say, manipulation of a child is not okay. What can we do? How do we go about trying to get custody or at least better visitation that she cannot deny us? They have a mediation agreement that has been signed by a judge. It says time has to be mutually agreed upon but she doesn't seem to understand it is not up to her and that they both have to agree.

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Diane l. Berger | Diane L. Berger
If the mediation agreement calls for remediation in the event of a dispute, you should start the mediation process. If that step isn't necessary you need to file an Application to Modify asking for either custody or more specific parenting time, whichever you want.
Answer Applies to: Nebraska
Replied: 5/1/2014
Grace Law Offices of John F Geraghty Jr.
Grace Law Offices of John F Geraghty Jr. | John F. Geraghty, Jr.
Petition for modification of custody would work.
Answer Applies to: Georgia
Replied: 5/1/2014
Trendowski & Allen, PC
Trendowski & Allen, PC | Gregory Allen
If you already have an agreement that was signed by a judge and made an order of the court then you have two options available to you. First, if she is violating any of the terms of the agreement you can consider filing a motion for contempt against her to have the agreement terms enforced by the court. Second, if the circumstances have changed since the agreement was entered into then you can file a motion to modify the existing orders of the court which were made pursuant to the agreement the court accepted when the judge signed off on it. It does sound like she is doing some things she should not be doing. This child has one father and one mother. There are others involved in her life, but it is completely inappropriate for the mother to have the child refer to anyone but her father as daddy. There are options available to you on how to address this growing problem. From experience it does not sound like it will resolve on its own. It may be beneficial for you to consult with experienced counsel to go over the details of what you are experiencing and to discuss what options are available.
Answer Applies to: Connecticut
Replied: 5/1/2014
Borzilleri Law Office | Christine Borzilleri
Since the two parents cannot come to any agreement he will need to file with the court for a modification. Since custody can be a complex and contested issue I recommend hiring a local family law attorney to help you.
Answer Applies to: Rhode Island
Replied: 5/1/2014
Law Offices of Helene Ellenbogen, P.S.H | Helene Ellenbogen
It sounds like a completely incompetent parenting plan that is not working as would be expected from a document that leaves it up to the parents to decide when the child sees one of them. The father should file a modification of the parenting plan, get a GAL appointed to see what is going on with the child and in the mother's household and to get a functional parenting plan into place that provides set times for the child to be with each parent regardless of which is the primary home. And he should get a lawyer so that there isn't another parenting plan with lots of loose ends.
Answer Applies to: Washington
Replied: 5/1/2014
    Law Office of Linda K. Frieder
    Law Office of Linda K. Frieder | Linda K. Frieder, Esq.
    File a RFO to change the terms of visitation.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 5/1/2014
    Law Offices of Arlene D. Kock
    Law Offices of Arlene D. Kock | Arlene D. Kock
    You need to return to court to address these issues.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 5/1/2014
    Law Office of Andrellos Mitchell
    Law Office of Andrellos Mitchell | Andrellos Mitchell
    As a former Social Worker, it sounds like a very sad situation to me. You need to go back to court. You have to Petition the court. The Agreement is unworkable and is not in the best interest of the child. It needs to be modified. You may just want to fight for full custody. The environment is counter productive to the child's development. It does not sound like it is in the best interest of the child. The legal battle may be long and costly. Good luck!
    Answer Applies to: District of Columbia
    Replied: 5/1/2014
    Peters Law, PLLC
    Peters Law, PLLC | Mark T. Peters, Sr.
    Your husband needs to go back to court and ask for a modification of the present custody order based on a material and substantial change in circumstances. I would suggest that the daughter start therapy so that a record can be made of any issues. The therapist probably won't want to be involved in the custody case, but his or her records should be available. I also suggest that he get an attorney. It will be worth the expense because the attorney should know the best way to present your husband's case to the judge.
    Answer Applies to: Idaho
    Replied: 5/1/2014
    Smith Law | Sharon K Smith
    You should file a modification of custody on the grounds that there have been substantial changes since the custody had been agreed to pursuant to the mediated agreement.
    Answer Applies to: Pennsylvania
    Replied: 5/1/2014
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