How do I get my son returned to me if my ex husband will not give him back? 31 Answers as of February 06, 2012

You will have to go to court and seek a court order granting you relief.

If no custody order exists, you need to get one.

If you have been divorced in the past 3 years, you should have a Parenting Plan in place that sets forth your respective custodial times. If he has violated the terms of that Parenting Plan, you can call the police to see if they will help enforce the Parenting Plan. If they decline to get involved, you will have to file a Petition for Contempt with the Court that granted your divorce or in the county of your ex-husband's residence. If your divorce was granted more than three years ago, you should have a settlement agreement or order from the Court setting forth your respective parenting times. Your course of action in that situation would be the same as above.

It isn't possible for neither of you to have custody, but your statement makes it difficult to answer your question. If there is an existing custody order and the father is not abiding by the terms of the order, you can contact the police and ask them to assist with returning the child / enforcing the order. If no custody order exists, then you have sole custody. You can again contact the police for assistance in having the child returned.

I'm not sure I understand what the situation is. How can neither of you have custody? Or do you just mean that neither of you have sole custody? I would guess you probably also mean 67% and 33%, because 77% and 33% add up to 110%. Regardless of the specific percentage, though, that implies that SOME custody order is in place, which means that your and his roles are defined by what the order says. If he's not complying with it, you can file a motion with the court to enforce the terms of the order. If somehow you DON'T have a custody order in place, then he hasn't done anything legally wrong and there's nothing you can do about it besides file a SAPCR, which will eventually get you a permanent order eventually, and request the court issue temporary orders in the meantime. Good luck.

You can file an ex-parte motion requesting court orders that your child be immediately returned. You can also ask for additional custody terms that will prevent this from happening again in the future. Best to hire a local family law lawyer to help you. If you can't afford a lawyer, then you can go to the court's self-help center for assistance.

How could neither of you have custody? Please dust off the divorce decree and the parenting plan and take them to a lawyer to find the rights you have been awarded by the court. The attorney can help you get the child returned.

Contact the police and provide to them your custody court order so they can assist you on getting the child back.

Your post makes no sense. If neither of you have custody, what do you mean by 77% care. The two statements are opposites. Come back, give us the actual facts and then your post can be answered.

I don't know what "77% care" means, but if there is no custody order, then you each have equal access rights and he does not have to return your son. I would recommend filing for custody to ensure that this does not happen again.

If neither one of you has been awarded custody, you will have to file a petition for custody. A hearing would be set and you and your ex can present evidence and testimony to the judge who would render a decision awarding custody based on what is in the best interest of the child. If your son is in immediate and irreparable harm while in his father's care, you can file an application for ex parte custody. If granted, the court would award you temporary custody without a hearing.

Are you saying you have 77% custody and he has 33%. If he isn't following the court ordered visitation, call the police have it documented and go back to family court. If you don't have a court order for visitation, petition family court and get one.

If you do not have one already, you need to get a parenting plan, outlining custody, on file with the court. This plan is a court order which is used to hold parties accountable if they do not follow the rules. If you have a plan you can call the police when someone does not adhere to the visitation schedule. Without this, there is nothing to outline who is entitled to what, which means that no one can really help.

I am a little confused by your question. I do not understand your reference "Neither of us have custody." If he is an "ex-husband", there must have been a divorce court proceeding wherein a custody order of some sort would certainly have been entered. Moreover, your reference to 77%/33% is also confusing. That totals 110%. You should consult with an experienced family law attorney in the count in which you reside to.

Your statement that "neither of us have custody" suggests that there is no court order in effect that gives your ex-husband any parental rights at all. If you were divorced after the child was born it seems hard to believe there is no controlling court order. But, if that is really true, it would appear that he is guilty of kidnapping a child that he has no legal rights to and you should be able obtain assistance from law enforcement officials. Otherwise, you need to get a court order spelling out who has what rights and then you will have something that can be enforced. You should consult an attorney who can properly evaluate your situation and advise you accordingly.

If you have not filed for divorce you need to do so immediately and also file for an emergency custody hearing. The longer your husband has your son the harder it will be to get him back, at this point if there is no custody order in place you both have equal legal standing.

Immediately file a motion with the family law court for assistance.

I don't understand why neither you nor your ex-husband have custody of your son, if your and your husband's time with your son are already set. Incidentally, 77% plus 33% equals 110%, so your calculation is not correct. You should retain an experienced Family Law Attorney to represent you, to file an Ex Parte Application for an Order to for your husband to immediately return your son to you and, to be safe, for an Order to Show Cause on shortened time for an Order for your husband to return your son to you, and perhaps also for an order for professionally supervised visitation for your husband, at his expense.

Your final divorce decree should have the parenting plan described. Call the police and show them the court order and ask them to have your ex turn the children over to you. You can call them ahead of time, explain the situation and then set a time when they will meet you at his house. If this has been a continuing problem, you can also go to the court to either modify orders or have him held in contempt. This is especially useful if he is also behind on child support and/or maintenance. Like many attorneys we will sit down and review the bills, the letters and your situation with you without charge. Your best bet is to find a good lawyer who provides advice on this kind of issue on a regular basis and review your specific facts; the lawyer will be able to give you an analysis of the law and your options.

If there are no court orders for custody/parenting time, then you may need to file an action to establish those orders and to ask for temporary orders so the court can become involved "sooner" rather than "later." I recommend you consult with an attorney so you can provide additional details and then discuss your options.

It's not clear but it sounds like you have a parenting plan. Call the police with a certified copy of your parenting plan. That will probably not work, but it might. Next, file a petition for contempt and seek an ex parte order requiring the immediate return of your child. If there is no parenting plan, go get your kid if you can safely and without traumatizing your child and file immediately for a parenting plan.