Can you tell me what the difference is when my soon to be Ex-Wife is wanting the majority of decision making? 27 Answers as of October 31, 2012

She is wanting majority decision making and I want split decision making. I told her that I just want to be informed and also be able to make decision for the kids when I have them. She told me that her lawyer told her that she will get the full decision making and I will not get anything. Really worried please help!

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Blough Law Office | Janis L. Blough
You will have the right to make decisions for the children while they are in your care (house rules, bed times, etc.). Also, unless you are a really bad actor, you should have joint legal custody so you can have input on major decisions and find out about school/grades, medical information, etc. If she gets primary physical custody, she will make decisions like hair cuts, make-up, dating, curfew at her house and so on.
Answer Applies to: Michigan
Replied: 10/31/2012
The Law Office of Cathy R. Cook
The Law Office of Cathy R. Cook | Cathy R. Cook
The type of custody determines decision making. If your wife has sole custody, she makes all the decisions. If you have sole custody, you make the decisions jointly. You can make the day to day decision when the children are with you. The decisions I'm speaking about are the big ones, non-emergency medical, school, extra-curricular activities, discipline, religion.
Answer Applies to: Ohio
Replied: 10/23/2012
Hamblin Law Office | Sally Hamblin
You need an attorney to protect your rights and fight for what you want. If you are not represented and she is, she does have an edge.
Answer Applies to: Michigan
Replied: 10/23/2012
Burton Guidry
Burton Guidry | Burton P. Guidry
Unless it is not in the best interest of the child you will get joint custody, equal decision making rights and equal visitation. Get your own lawyer to tell you what to worry about. AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
Answer Applies to: Louisiana
Replied: 10/23/2012
The Law Offices of Robert W. Bellamy
The Law Offices of Robert W. Bellamy | Robert W. Bellamy
If you don't have a lawyer, you are about to get screwed. You want joint custody with 50/50 decision making.
Answer Applies to: Alabama
Replied: 10/23/2012
    John Russo | John Russo
    Why don't you have a lawyer? What she is asking for is sole custody, as opposed to joint. People tend to get carried away with terms, sole means the parent with placement gets to make the day to day decisions in the child's life, joint means that the parties are supposed to work together on these decisions, e.g. what school they go too, what doctor etc, sounds good never works that way though. You want joint custody placement with mother, unless you are a bad person the court should give that to you all day long.
    Answer Applies to: Rhode Island
    Replied: 10/23/2012
    Reeves Law Firm, P.C.
    Reeves Law Firm, P.C. | Roy L. Reeves
    You did not tell me what the other lawyer based his decision on. Is it because you beat her, hurt the kids, or have no lawyer so they are planning to bend you over without the benefit of a kiss to thank you Sole Managing Conservator ship means one party gets all or most of the decision power. Joint Managing Conservator ship means the parties share the decision power. Joint Managing Conservator ship (JMC) is presumed, accordingly, either you have to agree or she has to prove to the Court that SMC is the proper way to go.
    Answer Applies to: Texas
    Replied: 10/23/2012
    Warner Center Law Offices of Donald F. Conviser
    Warner Center Law Offices of Donald F. Conviser | Donald F. Conviser
    You are seeking joint legal custody as a caring, interested and involved parent. See Family Code Section 3083. You should retain an experienced Family Law Attorney to advise and represent you.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 10/23/2012
    The Davies Law Firm, P.A.
    The Davies Law Firm, P.A. | Robert F. Davies, Esq.
    What does your lawyer say? It sounds like you are doing this without a lawyer, which is a serious mistake. You could end up not having any right to participate in decision making for the kids, you could end up with little participation in their lives. There is a lot at risk here, and you do not want to lose all of that.
    Answer Applies to: New Jersey
    Replied: 10/23/2012
    Dennis P. Mikko Attorney at Law | Dennis P. Mikko
    You should retain an attorney to assist you in this matter. The difference is between joint legal custody and sole legal custody. If she were to get sole legal custody, she could make the decisions regarding the children such as what school they attend without your input. It is a big deal and you should insist on joint legal custody.
    Answer Applies to: Michigan
    Replied: 10/23/2012
    Attorney at Law | Michael P. Vollandt
    You will either have joint legal custody or sole legal custody - not split legal custody. You can stipulate, if you like, to allocate decisions between you and your spousal but short of that it is one or the other legal custody orders.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 10/23/2012
    Law Office of Annette M. Cox, PLLC
    Law Office of Annette M. Cox, PLLC | Annette M. Cox
    My suggestion is to consult an attorney and discuss the facts of your case. The custody laws (including the meaning of decision-making) are changing in January. Legal decision-making often comes into play with big decisions such as choice of school, and depending upon how the parenting plan or Orders are worded, she might not have to consult with you. It would be best to consult an attorney.
    Answer Applies to: Arizona
    Replied: 10/23/2012
    Law Offices of Richard K. Jolliffe | Richard K. Jolliffe
    Your wife wants sole legal custody of the children. There should be a hearing on the matter at which time the judge will decide the issue. Nothing is automatic.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 10/23/2012
    Law Offices of Arlene D. Kock
    Law Offices of Arlene D. Kock | Arlene D. Kock
    The your question deserves the attention of an experienced family law attorney in an office consultation. With that being said, joint legal custody typically means both parents make significant children's health, education and welfare decisions together.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 10/23/2012
    John E. Kirchner, Attorney at Law
    John E. Kirchner, Attorney at Law | John Kirchner
    If you and your wife cannot agree on how decision-making responsibilities should be allocated, a judge will have to decide how each decision is to be handled. You need to recognize that whenever there are only 2 people involved, every disagreement results in 1-1 tie vote and somebody has to be the tie breaker. The tie breaker has to be one of the parents, or the judge, or some other mutually agreed third person.
    Answer Applies to: Colorado
    Replied: 10/23/2012
    WARM SPRINGS LAW GROUP | Elliott D. Yug
    When parties have joint legal custody all significant or important decisions are to be made together. This means decisions such as medical, religion, etc., are to be made jointly.
    Answer Applies to: Nevada
    Replied: 10/23/2012
    Law Offices of Frances Headley | Frances Headley
    She will have full decision making for the children only if she is given sole legal custody. California law favors joint legal custody and grants sole custody where the other parent has serious problems such as in cases of incarceration or violence towards the children. You should consult a family law attorney to advise you how to proceed.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 10/23/2012
    Danville Law Group | Scott Jordan
    You need to hire your own attorney. Unless there is good cause to award one party full legal custody, decision making powers are usually split 50/50.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 10/23/2012
    Law Office of Cassandra Savoy
    Law Office of Cassandra Savoy | Cassandra Savoy
    The courts favor joint decision making.
    Answer Applies to: New Jersey
    Replied: 10/23/2012
    Debra Crawford Annis Law & Mediation Offices
    Debra Crawford Annis Law & Mediation Offices | Debra Crawford Annis
    Do you have a court order? If you have joint legal custody you are entitled to share in the decision making. You should check your order to see the exact wording and I can further advise. If you do not have a custody order, you should ask for joint legal custody with the decisions to be agreed upon listed. You can find information about joint custody orders online and there is a California Judicial Council form that applies.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 10/23/2012
    Glenn E. Tanner
    Glenn E. Tanner | Glenn E. Tanner
    The difference is she controls decision making if it is not joint.
    Answer Applies to: Washington
    Replied: 10/22/2012
    Diefer Law Group, P.C.
    Diefer Law Group, P.C. | Abel Fernandez
    Well, you don't provide enough facts about your case to tell you what the court will do. Generally, parents have joint decision making authority. So, I don't know why she is telling you she will get it all. That does not sound right.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 10/22/2012
    Grace Law Offices of John F Geraghty Jr.
    Grace Law Offices of John F Geraghty Jr. | John F. Geraghty, Jr.
    There is no need for you to agree to that. Depending on her attitude toward you it can lead to problems You should at the least be entitled to be informed concerning all medical and educational, religious etc.
    Answer Applies to: Georgia
    Replied: 10/22/2012
    LAW OFFICE OF ANNE B. HOWARD | Anne B. Howard
    Typically in San Diego County parents share legal custody - decision making unless one parent really cannot be relied on drugs alcohol etc. joint legal custody is very important as it covers where kids go to school medical decisions etc. fight to get joint.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 10/22/2012
    Robert J. Merlin, P.A.
    Robert J. Merlin, P.A. | Robert J. Merlin
    Unless you have done something that adversely affects your children, there is a presumption that you and your wife will have shared parental responsibility, meaning that you will have to work together to make the decisions affecting your children. You should resist giving up any power to your wife. If you do, you should expect that she will take advantage of that power and adversely affect your relationship with your children.
    Answer Applies to: Florida
    Replied: 10/22/2012
    Dunnings Law Firm
    Dunnings Law Firm | Steven Dunnings
    Not if you have joint legal custody. If you do not have an attorney, get one.
    Answer Applies to: Michigan
    Replied: 10/22/2012
    Elmbrook Law Offices
    Elmbrook Law Offices | Gregory Straub
    The first advice that I would provide is that you should consult with an attorney to provide you with representation in this matter. In regards to your question, there are two elements in the divorce related to your children. Custody and placement. Custody is the legal right granted to both of you as parents with regards to decision making, the right to information about your children from schools, doctors, etc. You will be granted joint custody unless there is something in your life that would cause custody to be questioned. Placement is where the children stay. Some of the day to day decisions are expected to be made by the parent with whom the child is staying at the time.
    Answer Applies to: Wisconsin
    Replied: 10/22/2012
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