Can we modifiy the rules during a visit? 7 Answers as of December 29, 2011
We have primary custody of my step kids. Their biological mother is an alcoholic and is on her third unhealthy relationship. We want to protect the kids from yet another man being introduced. But we let them go to meet him. They got drunk and got into a blow out. Our daughter started texting us during the fight, saying she was scared and done with going through this again. Now my step son is willing to be in scary situations for his mom. But I think he feels like he needs to protect her. Anyway, we want to go back to court and ask that during her visits, it is only her and the kids, no more men. Is that reasonable?Free Case Evaluation by a Local Lawyer!
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Warner Center Law Offices of Donald F. Conviser | Donald F. Conviser
Don't put .all your eggs in that basket. While you could ask for that relief, it would be a good idea to ask for alternative relief, as well: that the mother's visits with the children be supervised by a professional monitor. Her becoming drunk in the children's presence, and her having a physical fight with her "boyfriend" in the children's presence might persuade the Judge to restrict her visits with the children.
Answer Applies to: California
Replied: 12/29/2011
Law Offices of Arlene D. Kock | Arlene D. Kock
Your approach is very restrained under the circumstances. Frankly, you should file a motion restricting mothers contact with the children and require that she undertake court ordered random alcohol testing and participate in a sobriety program. Your son is suffering from parentification ( where the child is in the role of caring for and protecting his mother). He has a right to be a kid and should get some emotional distance from his mother as well as counseling to help him realign his role in relation to his mother.
Answer Applies to: California
Replied: 12/27/2011
Diefer Law Group, P.C. | Abel Fernandez
Yes, if the living situation at the other parents is not suitable for the child you should go back and modify the orders.
Answer Applies to: California
Replied: 12/27/2011
Goldberg Jones | Zephyr Hill
You should absolutely consider getting the visitation rules modified to ensure the safety of the children. If she has issues with alcohol or abusive men, these should both be addressed in your attempt to do what is best for the children. Do not delay. Speak with an attorney as soon as you can.
Answer Applies to: California
Replied: 12/27/2011
Walnut Creek Family Law Center, Inc. | Merritt L. Weisinger
You can do this and it may be granted. Incidentally, you do not have custody; Your spouse does. You can also call CPS under the circumstances. Your husband should file an OSC for an order that his ex is not to consume alcohol during or within 8 hours prior to any visitation, and you might seek a testing order the day after visits at your husband's discretion. Therefore if the kids say there has been drinking, he can notify her to test. A missed test is considered a dirty test. There are consequences.
Answer Applies to: California
Replied: 12/27/2011
Peyton and Associates | Barbara Peyton
Depending on the wording of your current parenting order, nothing can happen to change that order "during the visit". You need to go back to court to bring the problem behavior and risk to the child to the attention of the court. If a similar even occurs in the future, after your daughter texts you, have to call 911.
Answer Applies to: California
Replied: 12/27/2011
Law Office of L. Paul Zahn | Paul Zahn
Generally, the parents are not told who they can and cannot have around their children. If, however, the parent is making bad decisions, then perhaps a professional supervisor would be appropriate. There is no bright line test for when the courts will limit or put special rules on the terms of the visits. Each case is different.
Answer Applies to: California
Replied: 12/27/2011
