Can my wife's ex-husband control what we do with the kids? 19 Answers as of January 10, 2013

He thinks that we only have control within our 4 walls and he controls everything else. Thanks.

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Reza Athari & Associates, PLLC | Seth L. Reszko
Obviously, your wife's ex-husband does not control the kids when they are in your wife's custody. I am not sure if the ex-husband has sole legal custody, but it doesn't sound like it. When the children are in your custody, you have the rights to make the daily day-to-day decisions about the care of the children. It would be best to handle this issue outside of Court because filing an action b/c the ex is interfering in the custody can be costly and you might not get anything productive from the outcome of the case.
Answer Applies to: Nevada
Replied: 1/10/2013
The Law Offices of Jill Puertas LLC | Jill Puertas
In Missouri, the answer to this depends upon the type of custody that the parties have. If there is joint LEGAL custody, the mother and father jointly make decisions involving the children. If one of the parties has sole LEGAL custody, they are the primary decision maker. In general, the party who has custody has the right to make day to day decisions for the children. Major decisions are made either jointly or solely per the parenting plan designation as to who has legal custody.
Answer Applies to: Missouri
Replied: 1/10/2013
The Legal Center | Richard Manwaring
When the children are in your wife's care, she can do whatever she wants with the children, provided it does not violate the terms of the court's order.
Answer Applies to: California
Replied: 1/10/2013
Law Office of Beth Jackson Day | Beth Jackson Day
No. He has control when the kids are with him.
Answer Applies to: Maryland
Replied: 1/10/2013
Pollock & Associates LLC | Candice Ragsdale-Pollock, CWL
Under Utah law, each parent is responsible for what occurs in their home and while the children are in their presence. Anything else could be considered harassment and detrimental to the parent-child relationship. I would advise you to seek counsel for an injunction against the ex-husband in order to enforce him to cease his control issues while the children are with you.
Answer Applies to: Utah
Replied: 1/10/2013
    Hamblin Law Office | Sally Hamblin
    All depends what the language of the divorce and custody agreement states as to whom makes what decisions. If not him, then no.
    Answer Applies to: Michigan
    Replied: 1/10/2013
    Baker Wyers Law, PLLC
    Baker Wyers Law, PLLC | Clifton Baker
    Let's look at the words "custodial parent." Most decrees make one parent custodial, and that means to everything dealing with the kids. If you live in a 'joint custody' state, there are still severe limitations on what the parent without physical custody can decide.
    Answer Applies to: Oklahoma
    Replied: 1/10/2013
    John Russo | John Russo
    Examples, please.
    Answer Applies to: Rhode Island
    Replied: 1/10/2013
    John E. Kirchner, Attorney at Law
    John E. Kirchner, Attorney at Law | John Kirchner
    What "he thinks" is somewhat irrelevant to the correct answer. Basically, each parent's "control" authority should be identified in the court order that established the current parenting arrangements. You (as simply a step-parent) have no legal control over anything. Without more specifics about what the ex-husband/father thinks he control, no better answer is possible. But, if you can't determine who has what authority after consulting a lawyer who can actually review the current court order, then your wife may need to ask the court to modify and clarify the current order based on whatever the ex-husband is claiming he has the authority to do.
    Answer Applies to: Colorado
    Replied: 1/10/2013
    Woolley Wilson, LLP
    Woolley Wilson, LLP | William R. Wilson
    Not unless you are engaging in activities that endanger the children.
    Answer Applies to: Texas
    Replied: 1/9/2013
    Law Office of Kristine McDonnell | Kristine McDonnell
    Not enough information provided to respond.
    Answer Applies to: Ohio
    Replied: 1/9/2013
    While the kids are in your wife's care and custody she calls the shots for normal every day activities. If there are big decisions to be made, they should make them together.
    Answer Applies to: Nevada
    Replied: 1/9/2013
    Oliver & Duncan | Donald E. Oliver
    In order to answer this, we would need to see the final judgment of dissolution as well as any other orders regarding custody and/or parenting time that have been entered since the original judgment. Did your wife get sole custody or did she fall for joint custody? How old is the latest custody order? Where do the children live, with you and your wife or with her ex-husband?
    Answer Applies to: Oregon
    Replied: 1/9/2013
    Glenn E. Tanner
    Glenn E. Tanner | Glenn E. Tanner
    Read the parenting plan to find out.
    Answer Applies to: Washington
    Replied: 1/9/2013
    The Davies Law Firm, P.A.
    The Davies Law Firm, P.A. | Robert F. Davies, Esq.
    Your wife needs to talk to me or someone like me, a divorce attorney.
    Answer Applies to: New Jersey
    Replied: 1/9/2013
    Law Offices of Arlene D. Kock
    Law Offices of Arlene D. Kock | Arlene D. Kock
    Unless otherwise court ordered , parenting decisions are to be made only between the parents and not 3rd parties.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 1/9/2013
    Peters Law, PLLC
    Peters Law, PLLC | Mark T. Peters, Sr.
    Doubtful, but look at the custody order to make sure what each parent has control over. If he doesn't have a say, then do what you think best and let him go to court to try and force you otherwise.
    Answer Applies to: Idaho
    Replied: 1/9/2013
    Woods, May & Matlock, PC
    Woods, May & Matlock, PC | Robert J. Matlock
    Generally, the judges believe each parent is entitled to set his/her own house rules and the other parent is not entitled to control those matters. I suggest you hire a lawyer.
    Answer Applies to: Texas
    Replied: 1/9/2013
    Musilli Brennan Associates PLLC
    Musilli Brennan Associates PLLC | John F Brennan
    I would have to see the order determine what your wife's rights and obligations are, as well as his. Generally, he would have no more right than your wife, unless there is some other provision in the judgment of divorce.
    Answer Applies to: Michigan
    Replied: 1/9/2013
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