Can my husband win custody of my children over me? 14 Answers as of June 03, 2013

I'm not 100% sure I'm leaving my husband yet but I'm thinking about it. I am extremely unhappy and it's not good environment for my son. I have one son (age 2) and a daughter on the way due Dec. 12th 2011. I'm currently a stay at home mom and have no income or family to help me out. I'm scared to leave my husband because he says he will take my kids away from me and he would win custody. I have been the main caregiver in my son’s life and he has an attachment to me. Even when I work in a day care, he went to work with me. My husband work nights and go to bed between 12:00 and 1:00 p.m. and work from 10:00pm to 7:30 a.m. He is also an alcoholic. I don't want to take our kids away from him completely but I don't think he's fit to have primary custody of them. Would I be able to get custody, when I don't have a job, income, or a place to live at the moment?

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Reeves Law Firm, P.C.
Reeves Law Firm, P.C. | Roy L. Reeves
Can your husband win custody? Yes, it is possible. The more important question is: Will he? No one knows at this point. In Texas, the golden rule of child custody is do what is best for the children. There are many enumerated items for the court to consider and you touch on some of those here. The ultimate decision is up to the Judge based on evidence, not "feelings" or "opinions" or "intuition". What can you show/prove. You say he is an alcoholic, can you prove that? What will he say about you? Can he prove it? Keep in mind, Judges have seen and heard it all, allegations are just that, allegations until someone brings some proof to the table. All of that said, there is a common theme in your question and many others - a husband says he will win, or he says he will take the children, or he says . He can say anything, that does not mean it is going to happen. You are both parents and both of you have equal rights until a judge says otherwise. What you need to do is stop worrying about what he says he will do, make up your mind what you are going to do.
Answer Applies to: Texas
Replied: 10/28/2011
Reza Athari & Associates, PLLC | Armand Fried
The court will look at all aspects - his alcohol use, his hours at work, your living conditions, EVERYTHING, and decide what would be in the best interests of the child. If you win, he will have to pay child support and you could get some relief from that.
Answer Applies to: Nevada
Replied: 10/28/2011
Law Offices of Paul A. Eads, A.P.C.
Law Offices of Paul A. Eads, A.P.C. | Paul A. Eads
Answer Applies to: California
Replied: 6/3/2013
Fox Law Firm LLC
Fox Law Firm LLC | Tina Fox
It is possible, but you do need to establish a place for them to live. You have to be able to provide the bare necessities to the children and prove how you are able to do so.
Answer Applies to: Illinois
Replied: 10/27/2011
AyerHoffman, LLP
AyerHoffman, LLP | Cara Lee Thompson
It's difficult to predict what the outcome of your situation will be, but it can be said that courts take many factors into consideration when determining physical and legal custody of your children, and ultimately, the court will determine what is in the "best interest" of your children. The fact that you've been the primary caregiver and that your husband is an alcoholic will be factors that are taken into consideration. The fact that you are unemployed is not a deterrence to you gaining custody, as the court will order your husband to pay child support in order to ensure that the children are taken care of.
Answer Applies to: Massachusetts
Replied: 10/27/2011
    Ashman Law Office
    Ashman Law Office | Glen Edward Ashman
    No one can give you odds but your odds shrink without a lawyer and improve with counsel.
    Answer Applies to: Georgia
    Replied: 10/27/2011
    Law Offices of Stephanie Lee Ehrbright, Esq.
    Law Offices of Stephanie Lee Ehrbright, Esq. | Stephanie Lee Ehrbright
    Yes, you could still get custody. I would speak with a divorce attorney before you make an official move to leave your marriage. It will make the transition considerably easier.
    Answer Applies to: Arizona
    Replied: 10/26/2011
    Law Offices of Arlene D. Kock
    Law Offices of Arlene D. Kock | Arlene D. Kock
    If you are the day to day caregiver to the child and will be in that role with your child on the way then there is a high probability the children will be placed with you. Please consider filing a divorce petition and a motion for custody as well as orders restricting fathers contact with the child(ren) if he is abusing alcohol.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 10/26/2011
    Glenn E. Tanner
    Glenn E. Tanner | Glenn E. Tanner
    Based on the few facts you've provided, it looks like you would be the primary caretaker regardless of your limited income.
    Answer Applies to: Washington
    Replied: 10/26/2011
    Law Office of Michael W. Bugni
    Law Office of Michael W. Bugni | Jay W. Neff
    Considering what little bit you've said, you would probably be the primary residential parent. However, like everything else in this business, there are simply no guarantees of anything. Further, the statute has a rather long list of factors to consider, that you haven't really addresses. Be that as it may, you really should see about getting someplace to live and a job. Those issues could impact the parenting plan.
    Answer Applies to: Washington
    Replied: 10/26/2011
    Law Office of Cassandra Savoy
    Law Office of Cassandra Savoy | Cassandra Savoy
    You can apply to the court. The standard of review is the best interest of the children. I suggest that you seek employment. The one thing that keeps women in bad relationships is children and no job.
    Answer Applies to: New Jersey
    Replied: 10/26/2011
    John E. Kirchner, Attorney at Law
    John E. Kirchner, Attorney at Law | John Kirchner
    Nobody can answer that question without more information. Obviously your husband "can" win custody (meaning it is possible), but that doesn't mean he "will" succeed in a court case. A judge will have to decide what is in the children's best interest after hearing all relevant information.
    Answer Applies to: Colorado
    Replied: 10/26/2011
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