Can I hold someone accountable for lying about their marriage? Posted on August 04, 2011

For several years in my 20s, I had an on/off relationship with someone. We lost touch, but this year (2011) he contacted me through Facebook. We communicated platonically, and I noticed in pictures he posted online that he was wearing a wedding ring. To make a long story short, some internet searches confirmed that he had been married back in 2006, which was the last time we reconnected romantically. I have correspondence from him in 2006/2007, where he lies about his marital status. Knowing that I became romantically involved with a married man has caused me enormous distress. I would never have pursued a romantic relationship with someone who was married or separated, and certainly not someone who I believed I couldn't trust. I have tried to communicate with him, to hold him accountable, but he has refused to speak with me. I am suffering from enormous guilt, shame, and depression, which has affected the quality of my life. I have spoken with friends and my therapist, but I cannot feel any peace. I am not a vindictive person, but I want this person to be held accountable for his fraud and for the emotional distress that I am experiencing as a result of him compromising my morals and taking away my choices.

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