Can I file for custody of a child that is not mine? 11 Answers as of June 13, 2013

My girlfriend and I just recently broke up, we were together 2 years. Her son was 10 months old when we got together. His biological father has seen him 2 times in the 2 years we were together. The child is about to turn 3, he calls me daddy and I love him and want to legally claim him as mine. Our break up was on good terms and she has agreed that if I can find a way to adopt or get a type of custody of her child she will consent 100% because I am the only father he has know. we have been looking and the only way it seems to do this is if we get married and after a year file for adoption (which we are not sure biological dad will consent to, he does not pay child support, does don’t support him in anyway shape or form. I am the one that pays for all of his clothes all of his food all his diapers, he does not emotionally support him because the child does not even know who he is. We are not even sure we have current information on his where about.) Is there any way to file to get custody of "my" son so that way I will have legal rights to "my" child?

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Law Office of Melvin Franke | Melvin Franke
Hire an experienced custody attorney. You have to prove the parents are unfit.
Answer Applies to: Missouri
Replied: 11/2/2012
Dennis P. Mikko Attorney at Law | Dennis P. Mikko
No.
Answer Applies to: Michigan
Replied: 6/13/2013
John E. Kirchner, Attorney at Law
John E. Kirchner, Attorney at Law | John Kirchner
In Colorado you can ask for custody if you have been a primary caretaker for at least the past six months. However, you may not succeed unless both parents consent because, as an unrelated third party, you have no independent rights sufficient to trump a parent's constitutional right to parent his/her own child.
Answer Applies to: Colorado
Replied: 11/1/2012
Leonard A. Kaanta, P.C. | Leonard A. Kaanta
No.
Answer Applies to: Michigan
Replied: 5/21/2013
Lewis, Pfanstiel & Williams, PCLO
Lewis, Pfanstiel & Williams, PCLO | Ryan J. Lewis
No.
Answer Applies to: Nebraska
Replied: 5/21/2013
    R. Jason de Groot, P.A
    R. Jason de Groot, P.A | R. Jason de Groot
    No, you cannot file for custody of an ex girlfriend's child, one that is not yours.
    Answer Applies to: Florida
    Replied: 11/1/2012
    Musilli Brennan Associates PLLC
    Musilli Brennan Associates PLLC | John F Brennan
    You have discerned how to adopt but that is not practical. I would suggest a private or contractual agreement as it is really not practicable to marry and adopt. It is not optimal, but the best that can be done under your circumstances.
    Answer Applies to: Michigan
    Replied: 11/1/2012
    John Russo | John Russo
    No, only what you have already found out. I know this is emotional to you at this time, but think this through long and hard before you do anything, if you ever do this down the road and somehow adopt this child you will be responsible for court ordered child support until this child becomes emancipated , right now that does not bother you, but later on it may if you meet someone else get married and have a family of your own, I know your intentions are good right now but think long and hard. In the end this child will never really be yours, and you may have to take from your own children someday to give to this one, it's not easy, but this is not an easy decision.
    Answer Applies to: Rhode Island
    Replied: 11/1/2012
    LAW OFFICE OF ANNE B. HOWARD | Anne B. Howard
    You can file and see how it goes. A case just came down from the Appellate Court this week where the boyfriend was trying to get some custody and the court said he had to establish a "familial relationship." I'd see an attorney so that the attorney can pull the new case and see whether it can be used in your case.
    Answer Applies to: California
    Replied: 11/1/2012
    Abom & Kutulakis, L.L.P,.
    Abom & Kutulakis, L.L.P,. | Jason P. Kutulakis
    In order to file you must have legal standing. In PA your facts may support a file of a custody complaint in loco parentis. You should consult with and retain an attorney.
    Answer Applies to: Pennsylvania
    Replied: 11/1/2012
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